The Power of Accountability Partnerships!
We have a great discussion topic today that is the most near and dear to our hearts –that is Accountability Partnerships. For those that don’t already know, Kendra and Becky began their relationship in the summer of 2021, a few months into joining their first trading educational program. It sure seems like forever ago looking back, but we were such a match then and still are!
So, why in the first place did we even seek out an accountability partner? During that time one of our trading instructors Vu hosted a trading psychology support session and discussed the importance of having an accountability partner. According to ActionBuddy, an accountability partner is someone with whom you establish an ongoing reciprocal relationship. Each member of the partnership commits to coach the other towards achieving their goals and be held accountable for progress towards their own. This relationship helps each partner stick to their commitments. Also, It's not just a shallow offer of congratulations when you achieve something or a simple reminder to complete a task. It's a deep relationship based on trust and commitment. Were both members of the partnership coach and support each other along their journey. This could not be a more accurate description of the relationship we have built together, poured into, and maintained.
This topic also really bleeds over to other arenas. It’s quite common for folks to seek out accountability partners when trying to build new habits to commit and make progress towards a goal–think diet, physical fitness, career advancement, budgeting, spirituality, addiction recovery and wellness. It can be as simple as having a neighbor you go on a walk with after dinner every night all the way to a paid mentor that is further advanced in the field your goals pertain to. When researching this topic, we found that having an accountability partner can increase your chances for success to 95%! Wow, that’s some pretty solid ROI (return on investment)!
So then, let’s cover what should you look for in an accountability partner? This quote I found is a great lead into this question. “Choose an accountability partner who is dynamic and can bounce off of you from moment to moment whilst holding you to your word, keeping you accountable,” says Scott-Hudson. Ideally you want to choose someone you can build trust with through being honest, vulnerable, and authentic. You have to be willing to let your full-self be seen for the relationship to be most effective and beneficial. Someone who is supportive and non-judgmental but also not too validating. Equally important, you don’t want someone who is inflexible or overly demanding because that may cause conflict and adversely affect the purpose of the relationship. A good sign that you’re paired up with the right person is when you are both just as invested, motivated, and dedicated towards tangible growth goals and mindset goals. It's so important to link up with someone you can really grow with!
Also, reciprocity is so critical to make the relationship powerful, positive, and productive. We all know that it can be easier to let ourselves down than others, and similarly the same is true with keeping promises. I don’t like that we’re wired that way but it is a factor that helps in accountability partnerships. We report back to each other when either one of us takes a new aligned action. When we share our promises, new approaches, and different strategies, it inspires and motivates us to keep grinding towards those goals. It’s a great benefit to have this back and forth exchange of notes and progress because while it’s a service to each other, it ultimately is a service to ourselves because we are stacking the odds of success even higher in our favor through these efforts.
A critical goal for accountability partners is to develop a depth of trust, security, dedication, and understanding of all the complex layers to really be what each other needs, even if sometimes it isn’t happy, celebratory energy.
From our experience in trading, it’s unfortunate that accountability relationship formations are not as commonly built for the benefit that they offer. Let’s unpack the potential causes for this shortage. I can think of one that stands right out – Money! The psychology of money has a huge influence on trading and psychology is something that ALL developing traders are working in, on, and through every trading day. It can be quite uncomfortable to let yourself be seen in this raw, real, and sometimes reckless state that many all of us have found ourselves in. Often, sharing our failed attempts and setbacks does not come easy.
Recently, we attended a virtual Lisa Nichols coaching session and this takeaway really hit hard, and is very relevant to this topic. She said that many people will often set a goal for themselves, but then decide not to tell anyone, just in case– and that “JUST INCASE” may as well be putting that goal straight to death. Clearly, you don’t want to let the entire world in on your master plans but having someone you can share with and letting them be your cheerleader is a great step towards being open to receiving all that is for you. You certainly have to break down these walls and establish a set of parameters that take time and energy to nurture a strong partnership with another but like with all things in life, you get back what you put in, and we’re all worthy of having relationships that serve and support us!
So, say you have your chosen partner. How are you going to best serve each other? A great first step would need to be to decide what times and frequency of check-ins and meetings are feasible for each other’s schedules. The depth of accountability is the next important factor – how much is going to be shared and by what mode. Are you going to share trading logs, P&L, execution charts, trade plans, hard rules and trading processes? Will you also support each other in other areas of life, or strictly trading? Boundaries and whatnot. Our partnership was born in discord and took us all the way to Kendra rooming with Becky’s baby Jacob last summer!
Taking the time to collaborate together on these parameters should be exciting and will be the first sign of your accountability partnership being a good match by the energy each of you bring out of each other. Creating a safe environment where you can think out loud together is the goal and will come with time as the bond deepens and evolves. The main priority is to start showing up for each other consistently and incorporating a new healthy routine that will lead to a more enriching journey on both sides. Another key factor is there’s no place for ego in this relationship for it to work. There’s always room for improvement even during a peak season and encouragement, especially during a valley. Honest feedback and constructive criticism with the intent to help eachother unlock your true potential and not settle for mediocrity. This is where it gets tricky especially as your relationship evolves and emotions get involved. It’s always a good idea to check in with each other and ask if the partnership is still serving its purpose. You may need to alter or redefine and add in some new methods, just like our trading strategies!
Building an accountability partnership is really a super power and a super strength! Becky and Kendra are a prime example of how powerful fostering these relationships can be and where they can take you. Look at us now - almost 3 years later still leveling up our trading careers side by side and now also growing a podcast together and continuing to set even greater goals for our futures. We really hope that you have a similar person in your lives! If not, we encourage you to seek out someone you can grow alongside with.