Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself
Goodness do we have a powerful topic to discuss with this one! Becky’s mentor Jermaine recommended one of Dr. Joe Dispenza’s books to her spring 2023 when she was in a particularly challenging period in her trading and both mamas quickly fell headfirst into it and really grew with the knowledge that they gained from reading the book and doing the work that it suggests for some true subconscious growth. This must read book title is Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself.
Dr. Joe Dispenza is a powerful force. The beginning of the book really paints the picture of who Joe is and how his journey has progressed to the knowledge base he has cultivated. As a world-renowned author, speaker, researcher, and chiropractor, Dispenza has dedicated years to understanding and combining the fields of quantum physics, neuroscience, brain chemistry, biology, and genetics to show us what is truly possible. Within this book, he provides the science and his personal remarkable story of healing as evidence to what he teaches. And still at present he holds seminars and programs all over the world to further disseminate his powerful and impactful message to those that are seeking this type of mind change and behavior modification. The best part of this book, however, is the second half where he really provides tools for us to stop being the old self so you can become the new self!
“If you want a new outcome, you will have to break the habit of being yourself, and reinvent a new self”
Check out our full discussion in the podcast below, including more of our favorite quotes and how we’ve adapted the advice into our own trading journeys and lives.
Let’s start with a solid overarching quote from the book: “If we want to change some aspect of our reality, we have to think, feel, and act in new ways; we have to “be” different in terms of our responses to experiences. We have to “become” someone else. We have to create a new state of mind … we need to observe a new outcome with that new mind.” This perspective really puts readers in the driver’s seat of their own lives. Dispenza explains that if we can do the hard work with our minds purposefully and consistently, that we can rewire our brains to the point that we are in fact on another level as a person and soon our outward outcomes will reflect that. If we can stop feeling negative, inconsistent, or lost, but instead hold that we are focused, driven, and competent; then that sense of self that we decide to live in will start being the reality around us. Sounds pretty amazing, right?!
While many might argue that it’s too late to really change, Dispenza holds that there is no time limit on that. But, it is hard. From the book: “Psychologists tell us that by the time we’re in our mid-30s, our identity or personality will be completely formed. This means that for those of us over 35, we have memorized a select set of behaviors, attitudes, beliefs, emotional reactions, habits, skills, associative memories, conditioned responses, and perceptions that are now subconsciously programmed within us. Those programs are running us, because the body has become the mind. This means that we will think the same thoughts, feel the same feelings, react in identical ways, behave in the same manner, believe the same dogmas, and perceive reality the same ways. About 95 percent of who we are by midlife is a series of subconscious programs that have become automatic—driving a car, brushing our teeth, overeating when we’re stressed, worrying about our future, judging our friends, complaining about our lives, blaming our parents, not believing in ourselves, and insisting on being chronically unhappy, just to name a few.” This makes a lot of sense. It is far easier to allow the habits we have settled into just led us every day. It is simple and requires almost no effort.
But, what if you want higher outcomes and success? What if you decided in middle adulthood that you want to pursue a new career or path - such as day trading, like Kendra and Becky have? Well, Dispenza’s got a point. If we want a whole lot more and new for ourselves in this life, we are going to need to do some serious work on also leveling up our mindsets and associated emotions and actions to actually achieve these goals. Otherwise the momentum will not be sustainable because of the pull of and security within who we have been for so long!
Joe does a great job of showing us the power of our minds. That we can drive our thinking and outcomes and minimize the influence of our subconscious emotions that too often we just let run rampant. Joe offers this warning: “When feelings become the means of thinking, or if we cannot think greater than how we feel, we can never change. To change is to think greater than how we feel. To change is to act greater than the familiar feelings of the memorized self.” It’s a killer point!
Later in the book when Joe elaborates deeper on how this process works best, we really got into it. We wrote notes from these chapters and spent some time answering the questions with some soul searching effort to really make it as impactful for our lives as possible. And the early work of that is all about recognizing the roots of your problem. Joe asks readers to ask themselves what is presently not working. Name it to obtain power over it. Like having a life review every day that brings awareness of the automatic memorized emotions. Be attentive to the traits of the old personalities of the past. Recognizing who you have been for the benefit that your consciousness can stop being immersed in unconscious programs. He educates that self limiting emotions are responsible for your automatic thought processes. Which in turn creates your attitudes, which impact your limited beliefs about self and personal perceptions. Gosh, did we understand that and really critically thought about the questions, such as What kind of person have I been, and Is there a feeling that I experience and even struggle with over and over again every day?
Dispenza then advised readers to choose one emotion that is a big part of who you are to purposefully un-memorize. This is one of your afflicted emotional states and limited states of mind, one of the habits of being yourself that you want to relinquish. With some possibilities being: insecurity, worry, guilt, shame, anxiety, fear, envy, unworthiness, or lack. After readers select one powerful emotion that most significantly impacts themselves, he asks that we then observe how the unwanted emotion feels in your body - such as: heat, tight, flushed, upset stomach, headache, neck tension, rapid breathing, rapid heartbeat, nausea, sweaty palms… Point being, our attachment to this emotion means we are mentally and physically bound by our past, that created this emotion in our personality. Emotions are the end part of experiences. By re-experiencing this day after day, you can never evolve and change to a future state. This step of purely recognizing the powerful hold our past experiences still have in our day to day activities paints such a powerful rationale of why we must tackle this in our minds. At least, it was a powerful realization for us!
This book makes you want to dig into the concepts and personal work to make these upgrades. It's really incredible in that way - the call to action of it. After the trip down memory lane and recognizing what you want to change, then Joe leads readers on the how. And he gets real, asking you to seriously own who you are and how you are showing up for yourself day to day with an admitting and declaring process. Here, you need to acknowledge your true self, rather than the self you show to other people. Allowing yourself to be vulnerable, you move beyond the realm of your senses and begin to develop a relationship with a higher power, being honest with it on who you have been and what you want to change about yourself. Humbly and sincerely admit who you have been, what you have been hiding, and what you want to change about yourself so that you eliminate unnecessary pain and suffering.
Declaring outwardly then acknowledges your self limiting emotion. Joe asks readers to speak out loud who you have been and what you have been hiding about yourself. Give up the drive to want to maintain how you want to appear. Release that energy, that ego. Consciously stating your emotional ties will free you from your old self. This closes the gap between how you appear and who you really are. When you verbalize who you have been, you also liberate energy stored in your body. This will become free energy for better use to create your new self and life. Holy Moly, is this a point of change for a person if you can wholly embrace what he teaches. It basically is a framework for calling out your demons from the shadows and kicking them out. Freeing your mind to create, grow and blossom anew. Powerful stuff!!
Part of how this works for people is through meditation. Joe is quite famous for his meditative instruction and his guided meditations are some of our favorites when we need a space to find calm and recenter. From Joe: “Meditating is a means for you to move beyond your analytical mind so that you can access your subconscious mind. That’s crucial, since the subconscious is where all your bad habits and behaviors that you want to change reside.” Meditation is something that brings us such peace and contentment when we can embrace the importance of taking this time for ourselves! And, you don’t have to be an expert at mediating to gain value from it’s practice. Beginners can really gain benefit from just trying for short periods regularly and with guidance to start. Check out YouTube for many options from Dispenza!
We got a little deep in this Market Mamas episode (and more so with the full podcast). And really it was just the tip of the iceberg with this expert from all the work he has published and continues to put out for the world. But, we want to bring you guys content that we really have gained value from and has aided us in our process of evolution and perseverance. And Joe Dispenza’s work ticks all those boxes. We love how he stated in this book: “Think of it this way: the input remains the same, so the output has to remain the same. How, then, can you ever create anything new?” I mean, that’s a potent point.
There came a time for both of us that we recognized that we were holding ourselves back from higher goals and outcomes. And we are not ones to shy away from hard work, especially if there is evidence that it will bring us the results that we are looking for. Sign us up, we will give our time and energy and show up for ourelves for these aims every time. Because we actually are worthy and so are you! So, that’s why we needed to have this Market Mamas episode with you guys. Because if you haven’t heard of Dr. Joe Dispenza, his work, or this book - we think it’s worth your time and energy if you know you are hunting for more for your life but encountering consistent resistance, like we have.
We can’t end this must read recommendation discussion for you all without the last and probably most concise and poignant quote from this book. It reads: “a new personality produces a new personal reality.” That is a one liner that really summarizes this whole concept. If we can dig in and fine tune our personalities and really prune away the negative so that our ideal self can fully blossom, then the world is our oyster! And Joe has some great tips, tricks, and guidance for readers who are willing. So come on, level up with us!!
Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself has a 4.7 star rating on audible!
To listen to this book for yourself through our favorite resource for audiobooks & podcasts, go to: https://www.audible.com/pd/Breaking-the-Habit-of-Being-Yourself-Audiobook/B0868ZFF7X?action_code=ASSGB149080119000H&share_location=pdp
Get this book for yourself. It is a serious game changer! https://amzn.to/4bUhUN6
To join us in our Audible obsession, sign up!!! http://www.amazon.com/audibleplus
Their titles are seriously the most comprehensive and Audible is sooo easy to use! We listen literally every day to something or another that adds such value to our journeys.